When i was pregnant i did my first spot of blog stalking! I gotta tell ya it opened my eyes to a whole new world of parenting!! I'd never heard of Attachment parenting before, and my first thoughts as i began to read kinda centered around barefoot hippies that ate weird berries and danced a lot around their house buses.
The more i read though, the more words like baby-wearing and co-sleeping started echoing in my thoughts, and the more i thought of baby-led techniques, like weaning and potty training, and being a SAHM (Stay At Home Mom)!! It started to sound so much more my style than crying it out, and self soothing did!!
After a good discussion with Hubby in which i told him this is what we were going to do, i set about preparing for baby's arrival in an 'attachment' kinda way!! We had the bassinet right next to the bed, so that baby could whip in with us if necessary (sorry Plunket), i had slings, swings and baby carriers from arsehole to breakfast, and i was prepared for the breastfeeding frenzy with everything from Lansinoh to Lactation drops!! I also had a stack of info on making my own natural baby food and had researched all forms of cloth diapering!!
Enter baby.....
So far so good! I love wearing my baby!! Our front pack is cosy and baby loves snuggling up to me in the Moby wrap (and wow it's comfy!!). He doesn't like the sling at all, but that's ok, 2 outa 3 aint bad!!(thanks Meatloaf) Breastfeedings also going brilliantly when i'm not drowning my child!! Having the bassinet next to the bed, Genius!! I can reach over to soothe, whip him out for a feed over night, and just snuggle him next to me if he needs me for comfort!!
2 Months on...
Everyone should be parenting this way!!! It's Awesome!!
4 Months on...
Still going strong with the breastfeeding!! This is obvious cause he's getting quite heavy in the old front pack, and when i wear the Moby it's got a considerable 'sag' happening!! We have to supplement with small amounts of baby mush though, as Bubba was fussing after every meal. I'm quite paranoid about what i give him, cause he seems to choke on anything and everything!! Waiting patiently for bubba to consistently sleep through for longer stretches....Suggestions of his own room?? Not us! We're attachment parents!! I love that i'm a comfort to him as he falls asleep, day or night, and that he needs me to fall asleep for every snooze!! I'm watching my child very closely for signs that indicate that he wants the toilet...So far i've been peed on twice and narrowly escaped a rather loose 'poo-valanch'!! 'I don't let my baby cry' is a phrase i'm having to repeat quite often as people try to offer me 'well meaning advice' about sleep training. I wish they'd try to accept the style of parenting that i've we've chosen!!....Its quite hard to find time to shower and eat when bubba doesn't want to be alone... Iv also officially resigned from my job as a Nurse so i can be a SAHM permanently!!
6 Months on...
Breastfeeding is still going good, although it never seems to be enough to keep his belly full over night. I have now learned the difference between 'choke' and 'gag'. More solids are introduced under my careful watch, nothing with sugar, salt or any form of dairy is allowed! We're all natural here!! Sleep is a thing of the past for all of us, and my baby gets quite grumpy if i put him down! I don't understand whats wrong with him!! My sister tries to tell me that i might be spoiling him a bit!! What would she know, shes only got 4 kids of her own, plus a few fostered kiddies!! Mum seems to be hinting around the same thing! Well she's only had us 2 girls, she wouldn't know about my wee boy!! No one seems to understand about Attachment parenting!! ....Did i mention that after MUCH consideration, we trialed bubby in his own room in his cot, just to see how he slept? Well he slept for a solid 7 hours that first night, and proceeded to have quite lengthy sleeps (compared to waking every 2-3 hours) after that. Who knew. I still bring him into our bed when he wakes through the night though, i love snuggling with him after a night feed (Of course he still feeds a couple of times a night, doesn't your 6 month old?). Cloth diapering is going well!! Although they don't last during the night at all... I'm still waiting to see signs of impending 'poo-valanches'! I still don't know what's going on til i get 'The Poo Face'. You know the one, watery eyes, red face, funny expression....
7 Months on...
Where are we at now?? Well, push chair all the way my friend!! I have permanently kinked hips from my wee heifer wearing escapade, Moby or no Moby!! I feed my child chunks of steak, avocado on toast, chop bones, large chicken bones, little tastes of ice cream if i'm scoffing it and he's giving me the googly eyes!! He gets a bottle of formula at night now, because my milk just wasn't enough and he's not old enough to just have solids, and i'm ok with that!! He sleeps in his own room, and i let him cry!! (All of my not handling him crying was easily solved by me turning the monitor off! I can still hear him, it's just not blasting in my ear). We are all sleeping Infinitely better!!! I try to discourage bed sharing at the mo because there's nothing worse than feeling sticky, sweaty little toes pinching your thighs in the middle of the night!! Bubbys become more independent and will play happily on his own when put him down now! Disposable nappies are used over night or if we go long distance in the car, because i have yet to hear of a cloth diaper that lasts more than 5 hours!! If my baby wants to poop, he can poop in his nappy, because honestly, i still have no idea what 'signal' i'm s'posed to be looking for!! I'm also going back to work part time, because it's actually OK to want/need a bit of a career on the side!!
I started my parenting career with a ridiculous romantic image that i wanted to fit into!! Alas, Attachment parenting isn't available in my size!! Neither is any other style of parenting come to think of it!! What does work though, is taking a wee piece of parenting from every style and stitching it together with the well meaning advice that my family and friends waited patiently for me to hear!! (I can hear a sigh of relief coming from all parts of the country) Awwww, isnt this so poetic and sweet......Anywho, The moral of this story is this....Parenting is flippen hard work, but you get there in the end!!
Please note, this is NOT a dig at attachment parenting!! I still think its an AWESOME parenting style, i simply didn't research it enough, and what i did know wasn't quite for us, i just couldn't admit it!!
Toodles!! :)
"Live for a life without Regret"
Toodles!! :)
"Live for a life without Regret"
Love it! I think all new moms have to learn for themselves. A little crying and a little formula is not so bad :) And by being flexible and acknowledging that things aren't working for the best for you and your child, you are being a fantastic momma!
ReplyDeleteI loved reading this! I am not a mom myself, but I have friends that are and it seems that once the baby is here your pre-parenting ideas and plans seem to change!!!
ReplyDeleteAwesome! Love your honesty babe, it will be appreciated by so many! So proud of you, you're a fab mummy
ReplyDeleteIt's all about finding what works for you as a mama. I'm part attachment, part common sense, part doing whatever I can to survive. As long as we just love our babies, that's all that matters, and you obviously do that so well!
ReplyDeleteI also wanted to thank you for your insightful comment on my post about Belle. You were so right in so many ways. I recently read a twitter feed amongst a group of bloggers where they basically bashed any parent giving their child ADD meds. It made me so angry, especially considering none of them have school aged children yet. So I really appreciate your positive energy and support, you are the best!
wow awesome post, I really enjoyed reading. And you are right parenting styles for everyone are so different and we all need to be so flexible for our childrens indiviual needs. I looked at attachment parenting when pregnant with my eldest daughter and I guess I have sort of followed it but really just done whatever feels best for us at the time :) I partial co-slept with her for the first three months and at four months she went into her own room/cot, cloth naps since 6 weeks (LOVE cloth btw!), done lots of babywearing but thrashed my Mountain Buggy just as much, gave her pureed food and now at 2.5yo she watches tv occasionally, her fav cartoon character is Thomas, she loves brocolli, has had McD (a lil too much that she now chooses chicken or burger) and shes happy so Im happy :D I think you are doing a fabulous job of being a Mum in your own right and following your own rules best suited to your family. xxxo
ReplyDelete~ Jenna